These crutches seem to be dominating my life at the moment. I went to the doctor a week and a half ago with pain in the ball of my foot. With great glee my parents had both told me it was probably gout and sure enough that was the doctor decided to test for. Though with a few reservations since I wasn't showing all of the key symptoms. She took a blood test and sent me home with instuctions to hobble on my heel until the results came a week later
Taking into account my ridiculous history of knee and Achilles problems in that leg I decided to requisition the random pair of crutches that have been in our cupboard since before we moved in. I've now realised that crutches are nowhere near as fun as they look! I have bruised hands and forearms and every journey takes forever (seriously 20mins from the bus station to uni!). So I have spent a lot of the last week exhausted and miserable, especially since I came away from the second doctor's appointment without gout but also without a diagnosis so I'm juggling silly insurance paperwork now to see a specialist.
But in the last few days I have realised how much this is teaching me. I have amazing friends who take really slow journeys with me and carry my bag around even to places that they're not going to. Lucy, Hattie, Rob, James, Nora, Rebecca to name but a few. And I'm usually quite an independent person and hate relying on anyone for anything so learning to be gracious and humble about depending on people is proving quite a challenge but I think I'm getting there. And I'm very blessed by my friends who help completely willingly and without ever holding me indebted.
Even so not knowing what going on and fear of the thought of a neuroma (something wrong with the nerve) which the GP suggested as a possiblility and the treatment implications of that and the general stress and exhaustion I'm generally a little scared and all over the place.
Earlier this song came up on my spotify:
Even though I feel like I'm walking (or hobbling) through storms, which though are nothing compared to what many people go through, often feel like they could pull me under, I have nothing to fear. My God is always there for me and my eternal life with Him is worth more than any pain or trial I could even conceive of. He will never let go of me, and my step on from relying on my friends is completely and utterly depending on Him. All my days I will sing His praises...wait that brings me to another song...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTBJlzNvVTE
But in the last few days I have realised how much this is teaching me. I have amazing friends who take really slow journeys with me and carry my bag around even to places that they're not going to. Lucy, Hattie, Rob, James, Nora, Rebecca to name but a few. And I'm usually quite an independent person and hate relying on anyone for anything so learning to be gracious and humble about depending on people is proving quite a challenge but I think I'm getting there. And I'm very blessed by my friends who help completely willingly and without ever holding me indebted.
Even so not knowing what going on and fear of the thought of a neuroma (something wrong with the nerve) which the GP suggested as a possiblility and the treatment implications of that and the general stress and exhaustion I'm generally a little scared and all over the place.
Earlier this song came up on my spotify:
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I'm caught in the middle of the storms of this life
I won't turn back
I know you are near
And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?
(Chorus:)
Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me
And I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
We'll live to know You here on the earth
(Chorus)
Yes, I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
Still I will praise You, still I will praise You
(Chorus 2x's)
Your perfect love is casting out fear
And even when I'm caught in the middle of the storms of this life
I won't turn back
I know you are near
And I will fear no evil
For my God is with me
And if my God is with me
Whom then shall I fear?
Whom then shall I fear?
(Chorus:)
Oh no, You never let go
Through the calm and through the storm
Oh no, You never let go
In every high and every low
Oh no, You never let go
Lord, You never let go of me
And I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
A glorious light beyond all compare
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
We'll live to know You here on the earth
(Chorus)
Yes, I can see a light that is coming for the heart that holds on
And there will be an end to these troubles
But until that day comes
Still I will praise You, still I will praise You
(Chorus 2x's)
Even though I feel like I'm walking (or hobbling) through storms, which though are nothing compared to what many people go through, often feel like they could pull me under, I have nothing to fear. My God is always there for me and my eternal life with Him is worth more than any pain or trial I could even conceive of. He will never let go of me, and my step on from relying on my friends is completely and utterly depending on Him. All my days I will sing His praises...wait that brings me to another song...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTBJlzNvVTE
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